12 rules for a healthy marriage

1) DATE YOUR WIFE: but carbon dating is only reliable up to 10,000 years.

2) RENEW YOUR MARRIAGE LICENSE: every 25 years you can get her antique plates.

3) BE A GOOD LISTENER: stay in the room next time she tells you about her day.

4) SURPRISE YOUR WIFE: flush the toilet twice when she's showering.

5) REMEMBER TO DO THE LITTLE THINGS: aim for the drain when you spit in the sink.

6) CALL HER ONCE A DAY: she'll have no excuse for not having supper ready when you get home.

7) TELL HER YOU THINK SHE'S BEAUTIFUL: and that you'll get back to her when you know for sure.

8) HAVE A CANDLE-LIGHT DINNER: it will delay her finding out you just spent the money for the power company on new fishing gear.

9) COMPLIMENT HER "FRIENDS": even if you do not know all of the voices in her head by name.

10) HELP HER WITH THE HOUSE WORK: start undressing by the washing machine.

11) DO NOT CRITICIZE: when she misses a spot mowing, tell her about it next week.

12) DO NOT UNDERMINE HER AUTHORITY IN PUBLIC: there is plenty of time for you and the kids to ROFL when she goes shopping.

God is great, Dr. Pepper is good, People are easy

Why do I bother with current events, politics and national history?

Because conservative is conservative and progressive is progressive. A progressive has the same inane character whether you are talking about theology or theater. Just think back over the years about what the progressive/liberal bloggers post. For the most part it's the same tired old dis-information. Not only the same but some even recycle their progressive ideations from past posts word for confusing word.

I have no delusions what-so-ever of convincing any progressive of the truth (right now four blogger's heads are spinning trying to conceive of this 'truth' I speak of). I do however hope to enter into a sub conscience dialogue with the few who read this blog and are rational in order for us all to develop a system of logical and reasoned thought. (Right now two blogger's heads are spinning with bullet points about "logic" "reason" and "something about baconian.... bacon, bacon, bacon".) The progressives are a lost cause. Our only hope theologically, or theatrically for that matter, is rallying the shy and reclusive conservatives and shaking the cobwebs off the brains of those who don't even realize they are conservative. If you can get people to thinking rationally about one thing it is all the spark you need to get the rest of the engine to turn over.

Culture, history, current events were in the recent past the rallying cry of the progressive movement in the church. However, now that all three have proven to be detrimental to their cause- they ridicule their use. These same little theos who came out of Dr. Willie Feelgude's college class a few years back with the mantra- "a newspaper under one arm and the Bible under the other" now decry the use of our present culture or hermeneutics. The newspaper has lied to them and the Bible has become alien to their thoughts.

Progressive theologians are the same as political, economic, or cultural progressives. Bait-n-Switch is their M.O. (modus operandi). Ten years ago they (progressive theologians) wanted to talk about history and culture but, as I said, history has proven them wrong and culture has devastated their ranks. (For example: even Rick "the musician" Achtley had to admit that there was no historical evidence for the use of musical instruments at the end of the Mosaic beginning of the Chrisitan period in either the Temple or the church.) So they moved on to the more esoteric- missional and to a position more befitting their progressive mindset- 'because I want to' theology. Missional will soon prove to be empty and awkward because.... it's empty and awkward. I've always said the standard missionary position is much more biblical than the missional position.

So, I talk politics to rally the few and dust the many. Let me prove to you who are weak and the few who sleep, yet have hope, that the methodology of the progressive in theology or politics is 100% predictable and lame. We are currently waiting for President Feelgude to make a decision on troops in Afghanistan. That is not going to ever happen to any real extent because the progressives don't want a victory in any military theater. What do you do if you are a political progressive or a theological progressive? You keep the conversation going in a different direction. It's a shell game and the solution, nay- the idea of a solution, is the little pea.

Here is what is going to happen in the next few weeks in progressive politics/current events. The conversation about "war" and "terror" and "security" is going to move from Afghanistan to Pakistan. Five years ago when we were neck deep in Iraq the political progressives said Afghanistan was the real place to be. Now that we have taken the war to Afghanistan they are going to start saying, 'the real war is in Pakistan'. All of the sudden the Taliban (who were once according to the progressives in Afghanistan) are not actually in Afghanistan, as they claimed just a year ago, but in Pakistan. And Pakistan is the ultimate "cup" in the shell game- a nuclear power, stable 'democratic' government -they can shuffle that one for centuries. There is no little pea, i.e. solution, in that shell game.

I just want the few, the proud, the thinking to wake-up. I don't need to convert a single progressive to bring the theological world back on track. What we simply need to do is to move forward with the biblical and rational- in other words BE LIKE JESUS.

(I can't even count the number of heads spinning now.)

FOR JOHN

HAPPY 'whatever'

GOAT'S MILK SUMMIT I

BIBLE IS GOD'S WORD

One of the points made in our Bible Seminar/Gospel Meeting was that the Bible spans a great deal of time and has various inspired writers. Yet, the continuity and clarity of message is perfect. Doug Burleson gave as an illustration[paraphrased]:

What if we were to commission a statue and we gave seven sculptors in seven separate locations all over the world over a period of 10 years the job of sculpting just a single piece of the statue? We gave them only the name of some local celebrity and they had no idea what the final product would/should look like. What would that statue look like when assembled?



















Do you think it would look anything like your local hero? It was a good illustration for inspiration.
[Disclaimer :) Picture was my own invention and had nothing to do with actual lesson.]

FOOLS RUSH IN

Newt (the newty) Gingrich supports Republican Dede Scozzafava.
Dede Scozzafava drops out and endorses Democrat.
Conservative Doug Hoffman in a close race with Dem Owens.

Seems "party lines" ain't the party it used to be.
How would you like your "tea" Newty, one lump or two?


Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
Couldn't happen to a better person.
I wish you could hear the phone calls between me and the Newt Gingrich pollsters/fund raisers.
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

MY CHRISTMAS GIFT TO BLOGOSPHERE

~FITTING IN~

I have decided to try and fit in a little more for the next 72 hours. I realize that sometimes I don't play well with others and I tend to not think inside of their 'special' box and I find life not as confusing as others so..... here goes.

Mr. A/W Goes To Cliche'Ville
==================

Oh, I'm not real good at this so please fill in the blanks the way YOU think that way we agree with everything- together- at the same time... (me fitting in).

• The Shack moved me to _____________
  
  
• What I hate the most about the "CoC" is _______________
  
  
• I plan on preaching about ________________ because I've never heard a sermon on that.
  
  
• That "CoC" sure is _______________________
  
  
• Why can't everybody be like me I always ______________________
  
  
• Its been ____________ years since I've heard a sermon on grace. What's with that?
  
  
• Today I got in touch with my feminine side by ______________________
  
  
• I just read ____________________ for the first time. It changed my life. Even more than when I read ______________ or that time I read _____________ or when ________________ wrote ________________.
  
  
• I just wrote a great blog about _______________________.
  
  
• I started a _____________________ ministry because we don't do that in this country.
  
  
• I think God is important but real Christians _______________________.
  
  
• As soon as brother _______________ dies the "CoC" will be able to move on.
  
  
• I don't know why a preacher would ever ___________________.
  
  
• Jesus never said specifically, in English, that we should ________________.
  
  
• I know what I think the Bible might say about ____________________ but I still _______________ it.
  
  
• I think people who disagree with me are ___________________.
  
  
• Even though I don't know the definition of ______________ I still use it as a literary style to whine.
  
  
• When I was growing up _____________________ happened and then ____________ and then _______________ and I never ever (every) got over it. Oh, and __________________ actually happened TO ME!
  
  
• Where were you when you first heard about ___________________?
  
  
• Today I'm going to _____________________ just to make myself feel pretty because the world is too focused on beauty. And I think talking and talking and talking about "pretty" is the best way to let young girls know that pretty isn't important. And I want everyone EVERYDAY to look at themselves and say "I'm Beautiful". That way we can stop making beauty our focus in life.
  

WOW. I really feel one with the blogosphere. This is nice. This is easy. This is _____________

ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS

I just sent my letter off to Santa and being a simple man I just asked for one and only one thing this year for Christmas.

CLICK HERE for more information.

Hoping, hoping, hoping

A WASTED LUNCH HOUR

I don't know why I do this stuff. I believe that somewhere in most of our minds is a small kernel that has the "stuff of common sense". So with that small, almost imperceptible, kernel of truth available to us all in mind, I proceed.

What's wrong with what's going on in Washington, DC?

A brief history of sedition.

This is Richard Cloward he is an old, dead now, hippie activist that along with his wife







Frances Piven







wrote a few books about over throwing the U.S. government. How did they propose this destruction occur? By overloading the government welfare system and thus collapsing the country internally. You can read about this here.

Frances and Richard had some friends.

Jeff Jones

William Ayers

Wade Rathke

Dale Rathke













Here goes:

• Jeff Jones and William Ayers went out from the mother ship of Cloward and Piven to form the Weather Underground
• Jeff Jones has a consulting firm that helped the Apollo Alliance write President Obama's stimulous package. Huh? Oh, the Apollo Alliance is a New York firm that is working to bring America green in a decade. Jeff also runs MDS (Movement For A Democratic Society)- the grown up version of the 1960's SDS that oversees the new SDS.
  
• Wade Rathke went a less violent way and formed.... ACORN. Need I say more?
• His brother Dale Rathke helped Wade form SEIU local 100. His brother Dale embezzled an admited $1,000,000 from ACORN (but now with ACORN being audited it seems that $5,000,000 was the actual amount.)
  

So what? These men and women have not changed their plans. They are older, dress a little better but their goals are all still the same. The organizations they formed after their lawless days have the same "legitimate" goals as their illegal organizations did 40 years ago. They come out of the same area and are all closely related to the Obama campaign and election. ACORN, SEIU, and many mentioned have close "adult" lifelong relationships and associations with Barack Obama. All of these organizations from their inception to their newly established systems advocate the use of two tools of warfare- [1] Destabilization of the U.S. economy; and, [2] The use of racial conflict to incite domestic violence.

The bail out, the national health care, the radical and violent tactics of SEIU all have one purpose in mind- to overwhelm and overload the present financial structure of the country in order to as our not yet President said 5 days before the election:
"We are five days away from fundamentally transforming the United States of America."